Tenshi Translations

Volume 1 Chapter 2 Part 2

Chapter 2: An Imperial Majesty's Punch

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You can grab the PDF here.

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The castle town——this, too, seems like a medieval European town that I might have seen somewhere before.

Stone paving and brick buildings. Every single house has a chimney or two sticking up prominently, some of which are belching out smoke even now. Probably their fireplace or kitchen furnace. And on the lanes, of course, there are no automobiles, but rather, several rickshaws and horse carriages coming to and fro.

No——they are similar to horse carriages, but aren’t exactly horse carriages.

Perhaps I should call them ‘bird carriages’ instead?

The car that Minori-san and I are currently riding is the same. For some reason, in this world, carriages are not pulled by horses, but by something similar to ostriches——in exchange for not being able to fly, these large birds can instead run very fast. However, instead of having long necks like the ostriches that I’m used to, these birds are round and stout, and basically look like sparrows enlarged to 2 meters in height as is.

To be it in simpler terms, they are chocobo.

Even though they looked really cute and charming on the screen, when there is a bird taller than a human within arm’s reach in reality, it is quite——scary. I feel like they might tear off my head with their beaks. They are apparently herbivores, though.

“Aren’t we going to use the car——the Light Armor?”

“I’m surprised you know our pet name for the LAV.”

Minori-san smiled wryly.

“Apparently, the hyper dimensional passageway is a pretty difficult thing to handle. Its width cannot be expanded.”

According to Minori-san——right after the discovery of the hyper dimensional passageway, they quickly brought an excavator over to dig around it, but all they got was dirt and rocks, and the passageway did not expand even when given more space.

“After all, if we get too careless with the enlargement construction work and the passageway suddenly closes as a result, then we would be very troubled. That’s why all we did was reinforce the place with concrete and resin. There is a limit to the amount that we can bring over at a time——the maximum capacity is about one truck’s worth. The LAV, too, we had to bring over in its disassembled state, and reassemble on this side. Due to this limitation, things like gasoline and other consumables are relatively scarce.”

“......Hah. I see.”

Apparently, this fact was one of the factors that led to the conversation of “commerce with otaku industry products.”

Having accepted that it is impossible to transport a large amount of goods, it is only natural for attention to turn towards data. Just by bringing in a single high efficiency copy printer, manga and light novels can be mass produced on this side, and there is much greater flexibility in bringing over paper-based goods.

As for anime, it can be made available to the public in a setup similar to a movie theater, and the only things needed would be a single projector and a screen. An amusement park can be built around it, and after also bringing in game consoles, visitors can be attracted and charged for admittance.

“Rather than that.”

Minori-san once again looks into my face and speaks clearly.

“Just in case, I will repeat myself. Do not do anything unnecessary. Do not say anything unnecessary. Understood?”

“I get it already.”

Right now——the place that we are heading towards is the Eldant Palace.

In short, just as Minori-san had already explained yesterday, it is the place where this country’s ruler lives. Like what the Imperial Palace and the Official Residence are for Japan, and like what the White House is for America, the Eldant Palace is where a ton of super VIPs are.

Furthermore, this time we are going there for an audience with the country’s Imperial Majesty——even I understand that in such a situation, any careless behavior may lead to grave consequences.

“Matoba-san actually wanted you to become more familiar with this world and its basic etiquette first before an audience, but......the Eldant Empire side insisted very strongly that they wished to see you immediately.”

“The Empire?”

“More likely their Imperial Majesty’s idea.”

So said Minori-san.

“To this day, the Eldant Empire is still in tense relations with the neighboring countries——to be more exact, border disputes on the level of small skirmishes are still happening every day. In other words, the country is in a state of perpetual war.”

“......Hah.”

I nod while looking outside through the window.

To be honest——the landscape of the town looks relatively carefree, to the degree that I can’t really see any traces of the country being at war. I wonder if it’s simply because this place is the capital. Or else is it because I simply don’t know what to look for.

“That is why they are imposing a powerful system of government centered around their Imperial Majesty. As they are in a state of war, the concentration of national power becomes a just cause. But that makes it all the easier for the ruler and any close associates to pass unreasonable decrees.”

It is quite usual for rulers to gradually go out of control when they no longer have anyone nearby to act as a stabilizer and say “no, you can’t do that” when needed. Generally, when it comes to medieval European worlds like this one——just like Miusel’s case, the citizens’ literacy rate is low, which makes it impossible for them to acquire information about their own country’s government and military matters above a certain threshold. Even if there is vague discontent against the country, the number of people who can actually put words to those opinions are extremely limited. Furthermore, the majority of such people are on the ruling side anyways.

This is a path that leads towards dictatorship, though......

“U-mu......”

When speaking of dictatorships, what comes to mind is definitely that country or that country or that country.

The first image that comes to mind is that of a middle-aged man with a sordid vibe wearing a costume that looks like working clothes who is waving his hand placidly at the masses from somewhere high up. Or perhaps......like a certain middle-aged man from WWII who had a small mustache and gave speeches in a hysterical manner.

“We’re almost there.”

So said Minori-san while retightening the necktie around her collar.

♥♦♣♠

The palace——seems like a masterpiece which no words can do justice.

Looking from afar, the size of the palace gives off an overwhelming feeling, but when seen up close, this effect feels even more intense. This is true for almost all buildings big enough to completely fill out a viewer’s line of sight, but this sense of heaviness is seriously no joke. If this was a manga, there would be a “don” SFX all over this scene.

The door opens to reveal a stone-tiled path stretching on endlessly, lined with the figures of knights in armor, knights riding birds, and knights riding dragons with folded wings. Speaking of which, Matoba-san and I are both being treated as state guests, so that explains this kind of reception.

The orderly lineup of people and things, combined with my excitement at seeing a certain race, is giving off an amazing pressure, but when the fact that everyone is fully armed is added on top of all that, the sense of intimidation is incredible.

Carrying the nervous two of us, the bird carriage pulls up alongside what looks to be a side entrance.

“Please.”

Someone who looks like a coachman opens the carriage door and respectfully prompts us.

After we nervously enter the palace——the heavy doors on our left and right shut close with a dull sound.

I’m getting the feeling that we’ve passed a point of no return.

“If this was a game, this would be the part where a mid-boss comes out, eh?”

“......You sure are relaxed.”

Minori-san smiled wryly.

“If I don’t say something silly, I can’t calm down.”

I sighed.

At that moment——

We see Matoba-san waiting for us deeper within the palace.

To his sides are, as expected, two people wearing swords who might be soldiers or knights.

“Are you wearing your magical ring?”

“Of course.”

I touch the ring finger on my left hand and nod.

Incidentally, both Matoba-san and Minori-san also have the magical ring on. Apparently, it functions not only as an interpretation machine, but also serves as a proof of identity in this Eldant Empire. Miusel was given one so that she could serve me, but normally, it is not something given to commoners of low social status.

In other words, if I lose it, instead of only worrying about not speaking the language, there is also the possibility that nobody would even talk to me no matter where I go. It is something equivalent to a lifeline for me.

“Well then, let’s head to the audience with the Imperial Majesty, shall we?”

Inside the spacious, spacious castle, we reach where Matoba-san is and continue walking together in silence.

The palace is also a building, so technically the world “indoor” applies here, but......the scale here is like that of a baseball stadium. The ceiling is high, and the hallways are wide——they’re so wide that I think a tennis court or volleyball court can fit inside. Simply by walking from one end to the other seems like it would be a really time-consuming thing to do. Without a guide, the sun would definitely set before we ever reach our destination.

Eventually——

“......Well then. This is it.”

Matoba-san stops and turns around to face us.

At the end of the hallway——there stands a double door remarkably huge for being indoors.

“From here on, we will be granted an audience with their Imperial Majesty. Any careless mistake could become an international problem. Everyone, but most of all you, Kanou-kun, be extremely careful.”

Matoba-san just casually said something really scary, didn’t he.

“Emissaries hailing from the country of Japan, three persons——have arrived!”

As the two soldiers on Matoba-san’s both sides raised their voices, the gigantic doors automatically scrape open with heavy sounds——most likely, there is some kind of mechanism installed——and reveal to us the interior of the audience chamber.

“......Oou.”

I involuntarily let my voice slip out.

The audience chamber, too, is excessively huge.

It is on a completely different dimension to what I usually associate with the word “room” or even the word “indoor.” The only places that I know of that can rival the size of this room are indoor stadiums. There is enough floor space to easily fit 4 tennis courts. In order to support this vast space, there are several thick stone pillars standing in rows.

From the appearance of this medieval European-looking palace, everything here was made with manual labor——at the very least, it was done without any of the heavy machinery that I saw being used for public works back in Japan. I get a little dizzy thinking of all the labor that must have gone into all this. Or perhaps for this parallel world, this kind of construction work might be surprisingly easy with the help of magic.

Then I turn my eyes towards the audience chamber——to its very end.

In the red-carpeted depths, there is a place especially higher than the rest of the room.

That is most likely where the throne of this Eldant Empire’s Imperial Majesty lies. On both sides of the carpet leading there, ranks of knights with swords on their waists are lined up in orderly rows. The reason why these knights’ attire is different from the guys at the castle gate and the ones who guided us earlier is most likely because these guys are the Imperial Guards, purposely tasked with the protection of the royalty.

“Kanou-kun, all you have to do is stay silent and follow our lead.”

So said Minori-san while walking next to me.

“Basically, just keep your eyes down. Also, don’t say anything unnecessary. Once we appear before their Imperial Majesty, stay silent and bow once like Matoba-san and I will do, then go down on one knee. For now, if you do that, then you won’t accidentally do anything disrespectful. Although this is a parallel world, they don’t have any really strange customs, so don’t worry about it.”

“Hah......”

I nod while feeling the focused gazes of all the Imperial Guard.

To be honest, in this situation——even without all the warnings, I won’t do anything careless. It is all too clear to me that any offense could immediately cause these knights to descend upon me and lop my head off.

Ever since a while ago, unease and nerves have been steadily enveloping me.

“Announcing!”

Once again, a knight, one close to the throne this time, formally raised his voice.

As if to match that shout, Matoba-san gets down on one knee on the carpet, and Minori-san and I imitate him. My face has been facing the ground the entire time, just as I’ve been instructed. Therefore, I still don’t know what the Imperial Majesty looks like, nor do I know what face he or she is looking down on us with.

“Emissaries hailing from the country of Japan, three persons——have arrived!”

“They have arrived!”

The knights shouted together in chorus.

“Bureau Chief of the Far East Cultural Exchange Promotion Bureau, Matoba Jinzaburou——as well as Private First Class Koganuma Minori of the WAC, together with AmuTec General Manager Kanou Shinichi. The three abovementioned have hastened over by the command of the Holy Eldant Empire’s Imperial Majesty Eldant the Third. Please grant us permission for the audience.”

Matoba-san spoke loudly and clearly.

After that——

“So you and your company are the people who have newly come to this country from a strange land.”

A voice descended upon us from above the throne.

“............?!”

I am so startled that I unconsciously raise my head, but Minori-san’s hand shoots out from beside me and quietly presses it back down. Thank you. She had most likely anticipated that I would raise my face. But if that’s the case, then they should have just told me from the start.

The voice that I’d just heard was completely different from my expectation.

High-pitched and small. Way too young.

More like——that was clearly a child’s voice.

Don’t tell me............!

“Raise your faces.”

The voice of a child gave us a command in a haughty tone.

I glance towards Minori-san for confirmation, and she gives me a small nod, so I timidly raise my face.

Upon the dais is a throne wide enough to have space leftover even if a bear sits on it.

The back of the throne and the armrests are both covered with dark red satin. There is plenty of gold leaf and silver leaf all over. From the parts not covered by cloth, detailed carvings of plants twining around each other stand in sharp relief. Even without words, the throne’s assertion of being an exquisite work of art can be heard loud and clear through the extravagant ornamentation.

As expected of a throne.

And as for the person sitting on the throne——

“LITTLE GIRL キタ————!!!!!!”

(T/N: Second time now, so I’ll leave the T/N from the first time here: キタ is read ‘kita.’ It means ‘it’s here,’ but please go Google ‘densha otoko kita’ to fully understand the feelings packed into these two simple characters.)

Before I knew it, I’ve raised both hands gripped as fists into the air, and have jumped up while shouting that line.

Indeed. Settled upon the throne——is a girl who looks like she’s in her early teens.

(T/N: Yes, I can FINALLY use pronouns for her! I’m really sorry about the slightly awkward adherence to “Imperial Majesty” before this, as I was trying to convey the author’s intention of keeping the Empress’s gender unspecified up until this point.)

She is wearing a blue dress, and her long, silver hair that is devoid of any wrinkle or curl is framing her white face. She has thin, sakura-colored lips, and her bold nose looks faintly upturned. Her large blue eyes are sparkling, while she herself keeps on fidgeting like a cat. In general, she gives off a cheeky vibe——but of course, that is what makes her cute.

Let’s speak frankly here.

Her Imperial Majesty is an extremely cute girl.

There exists a phrase “just like a doll,” and she is the very illustration of it. To be blunt, I can’t even wrap my head around the fact that she is supposed to be a human just like me. There is almost none of the earthly smell of flesh and blood coming from her. The small, golden tiara on her head only added further to her image as a “doll of a princess.”

How irresistible. If this was a manga or anime, then I would want to protest to the creator for so blatantly playing to the audience, but unfortunately, I think this is reality.

But still......

“Wh——Who is a little girl!!”

“......Hah?!”

Seeing the loli Empress’s white face flushing and her shouting loudly, I come back to my senses.

In a fluster, I look to my side, but Minori-san is just facepalming with an “oh he’s gone and done it” look on her face. I thought this is the part where the knights rush me, but——I think they’re all shocked at what just happened, because they’re all standing frozen, with dazed looks on their faces.

“I am no longer a child!”

So shouting, she jumps up with indignation, and zutatatatatata!, descends the dais with loud steps, and——before anyone else could stop her, she stops right in front of me.

After that.

“This insolent fellow!”

The next instant, the little girl Empress’s fist explodes against my face.

“Uwah?!”

I unconsciously bend backwards from a very nice straight unbefitting of her small stature.

While glaring daggers at me——her height only reaches around my chest——Her Imperial Majesty continues speaking, with anger in her voice.

“I just turned sixteen the other day! I am already a proper adult!”

“Eh? For real?”

Whichever way I look at her, she still looks like she’s in her early teens. Even if she wears a randosel, I don’t think it would look out of place on her at all. She’s small and even has a baby face——is what I almost retorted out loud, but I barely managed to avoid that slip of the tongue. It is because her Imperial Majesty had sunk a second punch into my chin.

(T/N: Randosel is the standard schoolbag for all kids in primary school. Traditionally, all kids are not allowed to use any other bag, so for the Japanese, the randosel is a symbol of primary school. More liberal schools nowadays are relaxing that convention.)

Nuu. Despite being a child, what a nice uppercut......!

“You doubt my words?!”

The Empress is shouting with tears in her eyes.

Uh-oh. Could it be that she has a complex about it?

Such thoughts are running through my mind as I topple over, face up.

Right then——

“——Your Majesty!!”

I see a jii-san with his face in a strange color running over by himself.

(T/N: Jii is ‘grandfather.’ -san is the usual prefix to indicate respect.)

“How could you do such a thing to the ambassador?!”

He is an old man wearing a robe with long sleeves. There are wrinkles all over his face, and the beard and mustache that covers his mouth is entirely white. Somehow, I think “sage” when I look at him. On second thought, for this stage, “wizard” might be more apt.

“It is because this one is saying disrespectful things!”

The loli Empress sharply turns her face away.

“Just remembering it makes me angry! Eei! You, kneel down right there! I’ll cut off your head for you! Someone, someone lend me a sword!”

“Your Majesty!!”

The old man who had rushed over is now trying to hold her arms behind her back.

“Please restrain yourself!”

“Let go, Jii! How could I be calm after having been mocked so?!”

She is wriggling around and waving both hands all about.

“Please remember, he is someone from a foreign country, and his customs are different from that of our own! His words were definitely not uttered with the intention of mockery!”

“It is exactly as he says.”

Matoba-san, who is still kneeling with one knee on the floor, spoke up to support the old man.

“In our country, one becomes an adult only after turning twenty. Therefore, everyone before that are equally considered children. His words were by no means meant to mock, but rather were an expression of how touched he felt upon beholding Your Majesty’s beautiful countenance. I beg of you, I humbly beg of you, to show mercy.”

As expected of a government official. His explanation flowed as smoothly as water does off a slope.

More like, his usual work probably involves a lot of finding the appropriate words to pull the wool over his opponents’ eyes, but it’s a secret that I’m having such thoughts.

“Mu......muu?”

Her Majesty frowns and looks my way.

“Is this true?”

“Eh? O-Of course it is, of course.”

I shake myself and quickly nod my head.

If I don’t express my agreement here, then events will naturally flow towards me seriously losing my head.

“......Mu. Mu. Mu.“

Her Imperial Majesty moans for a while, but——eventually, she looks like she’s calmed down, and she releases a short sigh and nods.

“T-......Then it’s fine!”

So said the loli ruler-sama while crossing her arms.

“The ability to let insignificant things slide is an indication of the caliber of a monarch.”

“That is indeed correct, Your Majesty.”

So said the old man while backing off a step.

Her Imperial Majesty’s steps back up the dais still sound a bit angry——when she reaches the top, she plunks her body onto the throne.

Thanks to Minori-san and the old man who had helped me, I recover and get back down on one knee on the carpet. For now, I guess we get a fresh start. The old man takes a few steps backward to take some distance from us, then nods deeply and smiles.

“Thank you for traveling here from a foreign land so far away. Kanou Shinichi-dono. The Eldant Empress, as well as her subjects, welcomes you to our empire.”

“We am honored by your generous words.”

The words were directed towards me, but it is Matoba-san who immediately answered.

Well, it was probably his way of telling me to not speak anymore. Soz.

“That girl is the Empress Petrarca An Eldant the Third. That old man is Prime Minister Zahal.”

On her knee next to me, Minori-san surreptitiously whispers in my ear.

“And also......”

She secretly points to the edge of the dais.

Taking a second look, I notice a young male knight standing there.

This young knight seems different from all the other knights. His armor is something else altogether, and I’m interested in why he’s allowed to stand at the same height as the throne. It probably means that he’s also royalty, or at least has the same standing as royalty——

“Galius An Koldbal. Serving as a knight of the Eldant Empire, he is also a distant relative of Petrarca’s. As one of the Cabinet ministers, he holds almost all of the power over diplomatic relations. Our magical rings were also issued in his name.”

In other words, he is very influential, and is someone with whom we have deep ties to.

When I take one more look at that Galius somebody——I realize that he is a picture-perfect handsome man.

As for his age, probably early twenties.

Silver hair flowing down to his waist. Slim lips. Deep intelligence shines in his long-slitted eyes, implicitly divulging the fact that he is not a simple battle maniac who cares only about physical strength.

His outfit is sheer elegance——his tall and lean body that doesn’t have even 1 milligram of unneeded muscle is wrapped up in a costume with the color white as a base. Furthermore, his handguards and shinguards are fringed with gold. Most likely, this outfit was made to emphasize showiness over usefulness in combat.

Around his waist are two belts, and from one hangs a sheathed sword decorated with beautiful patterns, the scabbard of which is fixed in place with metal clasps. The smooth, long mantle hanging down from his shoulders is almost touching the floor.

Unlike the other Imperial Guard, what he is wearing is not really armor——his appearance gives off a feeling exactly like that of a conventional hero knight straight out of a heroic saga.

“......Umm. Minori-san.”

“Quiet.”

“That Galius person, for some reason he’s been staring at me for a while now.”

I am acutely aware of the fixed gaze that is pointed not at Matoba-san nor Minori-san, but me——it’s a bit scary. But then again, as he is a close aide of Her Imperial Majesty, he’s most likely still mad at me for suddenly calling Her Majesty a little girl.

“Just remain quiet for now. Accidentally having another outburst again is a big no-no.”

“......Understood.”

Her voice sounded like she’s still feeling a bit sulky.

When I return my gaze to the throne, Her Majesty——Petrarca is looking down at me.

“Having heard that an evangelist had arrived, I was wondering what kind of fellow he would be, but this one is still a child!”

I really want to return those words right back to her, but I still have reason enough to exercise self-restraint on myself before those words pass my throat.

The other party is an Empress, and any careless comments might indeed bring danger to myself. However, my main reason is because I simply don’t want to say something that I know would hurt the other party.

This Imperial Empress is apparently quite distressed over the fact that her appearance makes her look younger than her actual age. I, too, have been on the receiving end of unpleasant words used to carelessly sum up the entirety of another person.

“As you have beheld, there might be a few peculiarities in his behavior, but——he is a person well-versed in the “otaku culture” that you seek, and the breadth and depth of his knowledge can make your eyes open in amazement. He will surely be of help in relieving Your Majesty of your boredom.”

So spoke Matoba-san in mediation.

“Hou. Is that so?”

Petrarca leans forward on her throne.

It seems that Her Majesty has acquired quite an interest in otaku culture.

Furthermore——

“Among those excelling in scholarship or in the performing arts, there are many with peculiarities——is this the same in that country of yours also?”

So said Prime Minister Zahal as a follow-up to Matoba-san’s words. The way he worded himself is a very favorable interpretation. Most likely, this jii-san is an advocate of the exchange with Japan. We are very thankful for his follow-ups and good teamplay with Matoba-san.

“I, for one, am not so sure.”

Having remained stiffly silent the whole time, the knight Galius opened his mouth and spoke in a leaden manner.

“It seems to me that Zahal-jii is interpreting things in a favorable light, but I have not yet decided to trust you people. Our side still does not fully understand what “otaku culture” entails exactly, but if it is something that can be mastered by someone as young as he, then I find it doubtful whether it can truly bring conducive change to Eldant.”

Thorns can be felt from every word of his diatribe.

It is blatantly obvious that he does not think pleasantly of Japanese people.

“If we carelessly let it in and only find out afterwards that it is a harmful poison, then it would be too late to undo its effects.”

Galius’s voice is loaded with wariness.

The same blue eyes as Petrarca’s is piercing me with a stare.

I feel cold sweat pouring out from all over my body.

Despite that——

“......Harmful. Harmful, you say?”

My moan was almost completely instinctive.

This is bad.

Even though I know that, I can’t stop myself.

What Galius said was right. It was a sound argument. Unknown things brought in by foreign parties are not necessarily good. As for the topic in question here, “otaku culture,” those who conclude that it is “harmful” without any hesitation——self-styled experts, university professors, politicians, critics, human rights protection groups, and a variety of others——there are many of them in our own world also.

Despite that——

“Even medicine can be a poison when taken in a large dosage.”

I feel Minori-san looking at me in startlement from my side.

But after having opened my mouth, I can no longer stop myself.

“Even poison can be a medicine when taken in a small dosage. That’s how things are. There are no clear lines indicating whether anything would turn out harmful or harmless. Being able to make these sorts of decisions is what it means to be an adult, someone who can take responsibility for themselves. There is absolutely no relationship to one’s age.”

I am willing to admit that I am a youngster.

I am also willing to admit that I am a fool.

However, I cannot forgive someone who would judge my beloved manga and anime and game and light novels as “harmful” or “vulgar” or “childish” without knowing their contents. Even if this is a parallel world, or even if the other party is a person of power. At the end of the day, being the hopeless otaku that I am, that is the only line that I will never back off from.

“............”

Galius has one eyebrow raised in surprise......for a brief moment, the entire place is filled with tension.

The heavy, strained air flows throughout the audience chamber.

I feel Matoba-san looking at me with surprise.

Most likely, that Galius person is someone with a lot more power in this country than I had thought. Enough so that no one ever opposes him. The reason why I was able to argue against him is because I don’t fully know about that sort of thing. If I knew the existent power relationships like I was supposed to, I would probably have been too afraid to advocate a different opinion from his.

But it is way too late to realize that sort of thing at this point in time.

And then——

“Fu............”

What broke the frozen atmosphere was a young girl’s laughter.

“Fuhaha......hahahahahahahahaha!”

Bursting forth as if she could hold it in no longer, Her Majesty Petrarca’s laughter rings across the audience chamber.

“Interesting! Truly interesting, Kanou Shinichi!”

“......Eh?”

Never in my wildest imagination did I expect her to react in such a way, so I whipped around to face her, with my eyes round with surprise. Looking like she’d just heard something extremely funny, she is slapping the arms of her throne repeatedly. She then speaks with a smile.

“To think that you would raise a rebuttal against Galius!”

“Your Majesty——”

Prime Minister Zahal and Cabinet minister Galius raise perplexed voices, but she ignores them and grandly proclaims:

“I am pleased! I, Petrarca An Eldant the Third, shall personally grant full permission for the activities of your AmuTec! You may do as you please!”

“Ah......”

For a second, I simply look up at this baby-faced Empress in a daze.

Immediately afterwards——while feeling a little triumphant, I flourish a bow like the ones you see at theatrical plays.

“We are ever so thankful.”

I responded with a little bit of a self-satisfied look on my face.